Katniss gets fat

Title: Katniss gets fat
Author: teamjacobBTR1D
Date Published: 2012

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Kat gets fat

After Katniss was chosen for the games, she found a strategy. In the days leading up to the games, she ate everything and got fat. In the games, she became Rue's ally. Later into the games Marvel was about to throw a spear at Rue when fat Katniss jumped in front of her. The spear went deap into her twenty-foot fat. She pulled it out. Because she was so fat, it didn't hurt her. Marvel was so stunned, he died. Katniss was so happy, she started to do the worm. Very badly. Her fat wouldn't stop moving.

"My eyes!" yelled Rue, as she ran up a tree. Suddenly, the arena started to shake from Katniss' weight. The remaining tributes started to fall into a giant hole along with Katniss, still doing the worm. The only tribute left was Rue, yelling "It won't stop!".

After Rue was crowned the winner, she had one more interview.

"Is there anything you would like to say?" asked Caeser.

"Yes. Thanks to Katniss for saving me from the spear. I will now always think of you as Fatnissa Everdeen."

THE END

DONUT FLAME

KENDALL: A TWILITE STORY.

Title: KENDALL:  A TWILITE STORY.
Author: Unknown
Date Published: 2014

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I wuz sittin in da living rum watch sum Grey’s Antomy when eddy ran in nd sed i smelled lik i wuz pregent!
OMG, I cudnt b pregant!
but it wuz tru. we went 2 da walmart nd got a pregnent test nd it sed i was pregent! even tho i had 2 pee on it ewww!

neway so i wuz pregent wiff carl’s babby nd i was soooo happy to hav a litle babby carl inside of my tummy!
but it was hungry for blud and lots of it!
so i had to kill Lauren nd drink all his black person blud cuz blak person blus haz moar nutryants in it cuz dey r darker.
Carl knos all dat stuff cuz hes a doctar nd stuff eddy wuz worred dat i wuz pregent wiff his babby nd carl got mad nd went to his mom’s hose 4 da nite but wen he cam bak he sed it was defintly his nd nut eddy’s so it was ok nd dat nite me nd carl did u kno wat nd he sed my giant pregent belly was virry secksi nd i dint look fat at al

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This is beautiful. I think I may be in love with Carl.

James Bnod: teh good guyss are evel guys too!

It is as it is, a terrible sequel to Eathuis' terrible story, this one written by Hollz100 as she tried to capture his artistic style of writing...

Autores notres: dis is a seqel to Ethauis' storry and Mogan feeman vill be playing Gandafl.

-CHALKKPSKoPFFDGTER ONE-

James bnod vas waking ups frm his slumbering slember and gandalf vas sittings on his head so they makeded face sex and jam nobd vas likking gandalfs furry beard and he vas having funs. DEN noo noo cameded out of nowhere wit Jam bond's babe and da bayb sed "you cheateded on me with gandalf, JEAMS BNOD! Now i vill killl yous with noo noo's help. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA" she yelleded in crazyness and throwded a knif at him and noo noo hit gandalf wit his hoover sucker tingy and sucked off his berd.

-CATHPER TOW-

Gandalf vas cwying in a twee becos noo noo vas rippeds his beard and his face vas red and stingy andh he vas missing his bareed. RTRTRTRTRTRTRTRTRTRTRTRT went the bab's masheens gunns and laz3r pistels at jaesm bonds face but she keptded missing then noo noo cames to help becaus gaddaalf busy, and noo nooe shoots hoover dust at james bnod's mmouth and he vas choking and the babe vas trowing lipstick. OH NO.

-CHAAAPPAITTPPAAPA KAKFKFKFKTER THRES-

den josh cooms oout of now wehre and he vas killing da babesssssss and eheer hoover vith his radioactiv peeenis. den dey died and jams bnod vas happy and he sayed "SEX ME JOSHUA VILSON!" in happy and he jj=umps in happy and dey maked sex in da air and gandafl falls out of vas tree and dieded.

DA END SAAN.

Jamed Bnod: teh badd guys are evel guys

This next story was written by our very own Eathuis (as opposed to Hollz100 who usually does all the work...). It was one of his first attempts and personally one of my favourites and possible the BEST James Bond fanfictiv ever written. Enjoy!

autores notres: Dis es epicc stery. plearse make sugestons abert wut to do nerxt.

CAHPTERER 1

James Bod vas haveng a nice tim wiv his babe wen all of a suden teh evel guys cam owt of no wheere wiv dere machiune gunns and dey wheere lik pew pew pew and Jam bond vas lick RTRTRTRT and dem badd guy budies all dieded and bonndss's babe sext him for 6 house.

CHAPTRERER 2

Der evel bad guys boass was in rage and scremed wiv angry "dam u Jammes Bod!" Teh Boss guyy sent dem more badd guys to fihgt.

Bod notised dem afterr sexy thing wiv herse girl frend dey saw de badd gers and dey scremd in frightening "U shalll dieded badd guyses!"

CAPTPTERER 3

THE LAST CAHPTER…or it is! All dem pepel dieded…even bod…or did he? Gandalf cam and resererted BNOD and dey weree happi for a long tim.

DA ENDDD! Sequel Son!

TWILA, DA GIRL WHO WAS IN LUV W A VAMPIR

Title: TWILA, DA GIRL WHO WAS IN LUV W A VAMPIR
Author: Unknown
Date Published: Unknown, Est. 2013/14

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Wen i walkd in2 da house edward disapered and den appered at da piano (hez a vamprie he kan do that.) he storted 2 play Famous Last werds by mi chemical romans. i started 2 sing in my beatifull voice "Wel i kno that i kan make u stay, wel den were iz ur heart? were iz ur heart?" every1 gasped, even tho they were vampirs they didnt hav voices lyk me. OUT of nowere they all jumped up nd tried to tak off my cloths.

"WOT R U DOING?" i creamed. deir eyes were red n they had all turned in2 savagez. den they stoppd and confused.
"Sorry Twila." edward sed. "sometimes wen we c some1 we kant resist we turn in2 beasts. it wnt hapen agen" puting bak on mi clothe.

"Itz ok a lot of ppl r attracted to me" i excplaned. they all understod.
"it must be ur blood" sed carlose in horrofied. "Beauty, u hav the most rare n exotic blood in all da world, evry vampir wil want to drink it. itz much betta den that other gurls, wats her name?"
"Dat bytches nam is bella" sed jasper growling. Midnite hugged him so he wuldnt get 2 angry n apper in bellas house n strangle her wif 1 tuch of his finger cuz hes realli strong lyk da hulk.
"twila, i wnat u 2 marri me" sudenly screemed alise hu was a plebian. edward rowred at her, furius n all protective n sudenly… he htransformed!

"OMFG NOOOO" i shouted cuz i dint want ne1 2 get hurt. eds shirt bursted opened wif mussels. his topazz eyez turnd pure blak with strengt n energy n he jumped at alice
"TWOLA IS MARRING ME ALREADI" he sed wif his voice was booming n all da windows exploded n da glass rained down lik in dat avril laven video wer she punches da miror n da glass all flyes out around her. He storted 2 fite with alice to da death over me.
"Guyz guys" i suddenly compromized "Guess wat srry im not a lebian." alice started 2 cry tearz of blood. "Y r her tears blood" i asked all curios

"Oh no this is bad" said emet hu had been in da bathrom da hole time. "wen we cry our tearz r blood n its da blood of our victims, shez losin blood n now she wil be thirsy agen. RUN"
Alic tryed 2 jump at me and tare my flesh but i movd out of da way n she attakd rosemarie instead hu was prety but she waznt as prety as me n her throat flew open. n blood poured out everywere n alice ate it.

"Ohh mi satan" i said heartbrokn becuz i causd so much truble. edward jus laughed "its ok babe" he said nd kissed me for da 1st time! (He had turned back from blak ed to white ed (a/n HEZ LIK HOTSANHARU FROM FRUITY BASKET) n he was calm agen.) "Shez a vampir, shell just cum bak 2 life."

so they sedeted alison n she fel asleep n rose came bak 2 lyf. we had berger king 4 diner bcuz i had 2 hurry. n then i went home thinsking of edword the hole time and how his flami hot lips felt on my. his body waz so warm n i culdnt wate to c him agen.

Sequel to Edvarf Zomble Stery

-Sequel to Edvard zombie story-

- Chaptrer One -

Edvard's Revenge

 Edvard vas sitted in lair. He liveded wit Darcula in castles. Edvard vas sad, "The zombies killded Belle!" He sayed in angry but Darclua vas happy. "But you has me!" Darclua replieeed, but Edvarf vas still sad. "I vill killded zombies!" He says and sawed evel zombies. "YOU KILLED BELLES! I shalls kill yous! HAHAHAHAHAHA" Edvard shoutsded.

- Chaprer Two -

OH NO! Zombies had kidnappeded Edvard and Darclua! Or has they… Edvard wokeded up in dark roome and sees Darclua tieded up nexted him. "My love life!" He yells and they maked sex then Belles walkdeded ins! "BELLES!" Edvard yells in happy "You is alive zombies no eateded yous and your bloods no felled on the floor!". "YES" Belles sayed but vas sad "I cameded to saves Darclua!" And she vas rescued Darclua and they make sex and then they runded away.

- Chaprer 3 -

THE FINLAL PART! Or it is….. Edvard escapes zombies buts they foollow him and he karateed them in theirs hearts and ripped their heads off on teh floors. Edvarf vas angry at Darclua and vant to save Belles from evel zombies! He runs after Darclua and threws him into walls and grabs Belle "I am saved you Belles!" Edvard sayed and taked Belle avay from Darclua who is dead. *note* – Darcula is not really deads buts they think he is buts he comes back in sequel. Then, Edvard takes Belle avay from zombies and they no eateded her brains and they escapes.

The end.

TWILIGHT: TWILIGHT OF SUNFALL

Title: TWILIGHT: TWILIGHT OF SUNFALL
Original Author: StoryProvider
Date Published: Sometime in 2011

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AUTORES NOTES: this is an twiligt fanfictive. it is be based on requestion from someon from tris site. please enjoyed readed ANT MAKE MORE SUGGESTONS!

CHAPTET 1: ZOMBIES ATTACKS EDVARD!
edvard vas goes on the place near where vas beles house home and he lokeded at to the sunfall and say "that is twiligtening and somethnig goinna happened soon but what" he sayed to noone because he has bad felings of it all
juts then HE SAWED ZOMBIES!
"we eat yous edvard cules" and edvard cullen sayeded "you cans tryed to do that" and karateed thems in theirs hearts! BUT THER WAS MORE ZOMBIE GUYS THERE TOO!
"we wills eated you!1" the zombes yelled to edvarf bud edvard used his vampire superpowars to killed thems but ther vas too many zombie guys so he has to runned to oter place!
"oh no they is goinna kill belle too noooooo!" then edvard sayed. he woulds have to find help but soon before things is too late!

CHAPRER 2: CULLEM FINDS HELP OR DOES HE...?
cullen vas now runs to some place and hads to go find himslef some help so he snaked into the airplane that goed to bulgeria. he had heared the rumours taht vampires lived there in place called transilsvasia there and had to go see if true OR BELLE IS BE KILL BY ZOMBIES!
he knoked at the door of the transislvasmia castle and dayed "is anyone inside on the castle" and dracula openwed the door and sayed to edvard cillen "i am darclua who is you" and edvard cluen sayed back to at tse him that "i is edvard culen and im vampie too nad i need yours help to defeated te evil zombie guys who want to killed my girlfried!" and darcula sayed "come in castle!" and edvard foolowed too
then dracula taked him to the gun room where vas guns stoled from bulgerian army guys!
"these guns should be helped us" edvards aksed from dracule and but dracula sayed bakk to the him: "yes it vill but you musts make sex wit me or i wont not help you!"
edvard thoughted it vas ulgy to make sex wit man person but he had to save belle so he remraked "okey lets do it" and draclue droped his rope to the ground! then they start to kiss and they has sex for 6 house and it GOOOOD!

CHAPTER 3: THE FINLAL PART
edvard cullem and draculla then goed back to teh gum room and taked masheen guns and lazers and things and put them to theirs bags but there vas not no time no more to thinked beacaus the zombie gyus hhad foolowed edvard!
"WHAT HAVE YOU EVIL BAD GUYS DOED TO BELLE?!" EDVARD YELLED IN ANGRY!
"we rapped her and killed her and eated the bloods! HAHAHAHAHA!" AND EDVARD VAS RAGE!
edvard killed thems wit dracullas guns and then sayed craying to darclua "i kill them all but belole is still gones!" and dracula comfortsed him and sayd "but you is still have me!" so edvard jumpsewd to to his arms and they make sex again and all vas tobe happy!

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Reviews:

"This is quite honestly THE best fanfiction I've ever gotten the right to read. In hundreds of years, people will go back to look at our literature, and dream of literary epics such as "The Hunger Games", "Harry Potter", and "Twilight: Twilight Of Sunfall". The plotline was INCREDIBLY well drawn out, and I could picture the entire love scene in my head." 

 "Wow, truly a magnificent story. I have never been so captivated in the development of both plot and character. If there were any way to improve the story, I couldn't begin to think of one! I cannot describe the amount of raw emotion and compassion I felt for Edvarf and Darclua, you, sir, deserve to be published."

"Hey, how'd you get my notes for the next novel in the Twilight Saga?"
-Stephanie Meyer

"Umm I'm guessing your not from America? You had some spelling errors along with grammar mistakes,but good luck."
-Some Un-named Idiot